Recap:
The given commandment alerts me to my misstep the guilt of which can be redeemed, not by making more rules to attempt greater perfection, but by learning to practice forgiveness towards myself and others.
The given commandment alerts me to my misstep the guilt of which can be redeemed, not by making more rules to attempt greater perfection, but by learning to practice forgiveness towards myself and others.
Elaboration:
While taking a shower this morning, I recalled the idea of forgiveness from my conversation with Don yesterday. I compared my own experience with forgiveness and realised - while getting wet - that you have to learn to forgive. You can’t just proclaim it and be done with it. You have to practice the act of forgiving.
This showery insight asks for elaboration of course and that is why I am writing about it here. Forgiving yourself relates to and is connected with forgiving others; others that is, who have hurt you, diminished you, insulted you and you name it. This I can recall, but I can also recall and relive the emotions even of times that I was doing the insulting, ignored loved ones in my own family or never understood good intentions until much later, beyond the compensation of making up.
Such recalls of events, scenarios and their associated feelings can still be hurtful and make me feel guilty and inadequate. ‘If only I had been more considerate or understanding’, or ‘I should not have been so self absorbed, but more open to my former spouse or child, etc.’
When I find myself in such a relived ‘mood’ if you like, I used to push it aside. That helps then, but does not resolve the issue. However, it has at least been admitted to my conscious awareness as real and so is the beginning of the assimilation process.
The next time this recall experience surfaces again, I say: ‘Well I did make a mistake that I cannot undo, but who is perfect?’ Now I am in the position of having accepted it, instead of pushing it away.
Once I accept it this way I can start to examine it as follows. I hurt others, but I was also hurt. I was ignorant at the time, but now I know better. I am learning from my old missteps and becoming more considerate and yes forgiving of my self and others. We are all human, and without the mistakes there would be no improvements.
There was an other aspect to my earlier ‘shower thought’. It is that a commandment such as ‘love you neighbour as yourself’ or ‘forgive my self like I forgive others’ are an early way of being aware of the way out from the keep of guilt. Such commandments are really advise as to how to deal with this feeling of guilt.
The commandments very existence is witness to the fact that we humans do have our failings and that as such we should accept that. The old way - as I call it - is to set up rules that prevent you from making such transgressions. However, as life has become more complex, such rule based systems become too restrictive and lead to withdrawal from life all together.
The solution is to learn to deal with your shortcomings by acknowledging them, to forgive and learn from them, to change your own attitude and behaviours and help others do the same.
This is the process of redemption as I like to put that, giving practical meaning close to home of that old religious concept, old but still valid and relevant, as long as we can translate it into our post modern perspectives on our human existence within Existence Divine.
<8:57am
P.S: This process of self examination makes us more conscious as humans.
<9:31am~
