Last Tuesday I met with Sarah, her friends and aunt at Savour’s, all complete with little Sole and Louie the heavy. In the aft I caught up on my missed sleep from picking up Elisabeth from the airport at midnight. There I paid 8$+ for a 3-minute overstay on the free parking, as mentioned!

Wednesday morning I had my annual tests taken at coffee time and walked back again after a ’restorative’ coffee and muffin to feed my empty stomach. Lunch was next, followed by a good snooze. Then it was off to visit Juliet for our weekly social, dinner and computer tasks.

Wednesday morning I had my annual tests taken at coffee time and walked back again after a ’restorative’ coffee and muffin to feed my empty stomach.

In the evening I made a start with the first - structure - of the five categories in which I’ve divided the fifty pages of Blue Norcom written notes. I started those with my mentioned dream at the end of May this year and have now more or less completed those notes.

Today I’ll meet up with John for a morning coffee and with Don for an afternoon tea at Kingsland. In Writings below I intend to report on my dream from the morning, which has me still occupied mentally.

Dream and comments.

Dream description:

That dream was more impressive than I first realised. It went as follows. “With a group of people we are busy looking and examining the way early human cultures operated and still do, but are disappearing. On this we kind of agreed as we went about our inspections. We were beating with some specially designed sticks to chase and nock out some creatures in shallow ponds. The method was effective for the culture that it served.

Then the dream scene switches to a very different setting. I am following an non-descript lead - as in leader - man, with all my acquaintances with whom I was examining the early human cultures following me in turn. The scene that I come to reminds me vaguely of the bathroom window from the house I grew up in as a youngster and late teens. [Recall from my memory: I used to crawl out of that window and then make my way into the yard.]

I knew I would have to face this and am not ready to take this scary steep descend balancing just on that smooth cable.

In the dream this lead man now opens a door and I already suspect what awaits me. From the door sill stretches a sturdy new and shiny steel suspension cable, inclining steeply into the depth below. Just this cable, sturdy as it may be, but not having anything to hang on to. I knew I would have to face this and am not ready to take this scary steep descend balancing just on that smooth cable.

I step aside, too apprehensive to take the first step. The people who come behind me go on and some one calls out a challenge to me, while they all proceed. I watch them pass me by, followed by their baggage which follows the descend, wobbling like moving along an the baggage belt at the airport check-in counter! By now the cable has more or less turned into this horizontal belt, but I am still standing at the top looking at this steeply inclined cable that I have to walk on, balancing unassisted and afraid to slip as it far too steep to me.”
With this last scene I wake up, wondering what this dream might mean.!

Comments:

Thinking about this dream scenario and its real feelings of being afraid, I try to find a match for it in my daily life. I find one in the process that I started this weekend and worked on in the last few days. It is the organising of the fifty (50) pages of handwritten notes in the Blue Norcom Cahier.

These notes I started with the intend to come to a formulation of a belief framework for ‘Existence Divine’. The very early start of this process was with an examination of early religions and I closed that off this year with talks about the Mayan, Mani-Gnostic and African Religion. And I am scared to take that first step of asserting my own perspective and conviction as how and with what to proceed.

And I am scared to take that first step of asserting my own perspective and conviction as how and with what to proceed.

At the same time, as I think about this, I realise that I have to move forward and step on that cable, so to speak. With that insight the cable scene from the dream now changes. I start to notice steps surmounted on the round cable surface for my feet to fit into and keeping me from sliding down that long steep incline.

Next I notice that the main cable is stabilised by stay cables, coming in from the sides. In addition guiding cables are there at waist height to hang onto as I walk the cable! This resolves the tension and anxiety, the more so now that the cable has taken on a horizontal attitude, more like a bridge going over a river or ravine.

I conclude that the dream affirms my anxiety about taking the lead in stepping on this cable - my intended new frame work and that as I do so, the needed supports will appear in time and the way to proceed will become clear. So far the dream and its comments. <9:25am

HandNotes:

I now want to mention how I ordered the mentioned fifty page of notes in the ‘Norcom’ cahier. I made a ‘content’ list that has thirty-four (34) entrees so far, each dated, titled and with its page number recorded. These thirty four entries have been allocated into the following categories: Restructuring Tradition, Teaching, Content, Humanity & Diversity and Narrative, with ‘Exploring’ as a possible additional future category.

'At seventy a human must follow its own path.' I am seventy nine now, so I want to record some results!

The thirty four (34) entries have each been allocated to one of the five (5) categories. My plan is to study them in detail, making extracts of the entries of each category and notes as I go. This process I started last night, completing entries 1, 2, 3 in category one (1), Structuring.

Now I need to persist and get to the end before I make any major conclusions. This may take a while, but as I said in Oct 2006 at that gathering with Derrick’s friends at SSI: “At seventy a human must follow its own path.” I am seventy nine now, so I want to record some results!
<9:56am and 4:25pm~